How to know when it is time to divorce

Do you avoid looking at social media because all your friends constantly post about their happy families? Do you dread receiving wedding invitations because the thought of hearing those vows makes your heart ache? Did you fall asleep last night again, thinking about how different your life would be if you were not married to your spouse?

Perhaps you have entertained the thought of divorce over and over, but you just can’t decide if it is the right thing to do. You know many happily married couples in Utah, but you may also know couples who are in much worse situations, and this makes it hard to determine if you should stick it out a little longer. While deciding if and when to divorce is deeply personal, there are some signs that indicate you may not be able to rescue or revive your marriage.

Weighing all the factors

Your unhappiness may be the most glaring sign that your marriage is over. If you have struggled with discontent and dissatisfaction, you may have taken steps to overcome these feelings, such as seeing a marriage counselor or learning ways to spice up your romance. However, the intimacy and communication may have ended long ago, leaving you in a lonely relationship. In addition, you may be experiencing any of these or other circumstances:

• You and your spouse have lost respect for each other.
• Your conversations with your spouse quickly become defensive, or you shut down altogether.
• You find it too difficult to feel sympathy for or even interest in your spouse.
• Your spouse has shown no interest in making the marriage better.
• Your spouse avoids talking with you about important matters in the marriage.
• You and your spouse no longer share any physical intimacy, and you have no desire to.
• You no longer trust your spouse.

If you have children, you may feel it is better to remain in the marriage for their sake. However, observe how your unhappiness may bleed into your relationship with your children, and honestly ask yourself how long you can maintain a positive outlook.

You will also have to consider the many elements of your life that will drastically change if you should divorce, including your living arrangements and your finances. In these early stages of decision making, the advice of an attorney may be a valuable resource.