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Making the adjustment easier for the children in a divorce

Going from one household to two is often a challenge for Utah couples who are ending their marriages. However, when there are children involved, the importance of making a smooth transition becomes a significant priority for most parents. How children adjust during and following the divorce often sets the stage for the future. 

Utah parents who spend their time focusing on their resentment, hurt and anger toward each other could inadvertently sabotage the chances of giving their children the best opportunities for seamless adjustments. Granted, there will be some trepidation and issues regardless, but ensuring that children feel loved and secure will go a long way. In order to provide this to them, parents often have to put aside their feelings for each other and focus on being parents.

Although a personal relationship may have ended, being parents does not end. The parenting plan that the parties negotiate can include a way to resolve conflicts, a promise not to speak ill of each other in front of the children and other behavioral agreements that will keep the children out of an adult relationship. After all, the children are not the ones getting the divorce, and they should not have to feel like they have to pick one parent over the other.

Getting a divorce always comes with challenges, and they are often multiplied when children are involved. Even though the structure of the family is changing, children need to know that both parents still love them and want to be there for them as much as possible. Creating an atmosphere that lets them know that they are not losing either parent will help them -- and ultimately the parties as well.

Source: The Huffington Post, "What Your Children Want In Your Divorce", Cherie Morris, July 8, 2016

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